I don't hate people
But I feel out of control and I'm digging deep to just trust that things will work out. Have faith. It's super tough.
(Written March 11, 2018 and not published until a year later)
Here is the backstory:
2017 I spent building a marketing company. It's called wholesaling, but it's essentially being the marketing and sales department for other rehabbers. We broke even 9 months out of the year, and then the last quarter everything came together and we crushed it. I was fired up for 2018 to start and had dreams of just crushing the crap out of it. Monster goals. $2.1M goals (which, btw, is 4x what we did last year, but seemed totally doable with the trajectory we were on)
And then everything slowed down. Still putting out the same marketing, hitting the channels that worked and adding in some new ones to try to get efficient. Still getting the appointments. Not getting the contracts. (Our goal was 16, we got about 6 in Jan and Feb) But when we got those contracts, they sold fast. Now our past 2 contracts aren't selling. One property we've had under contract since October (with 2 different buyers), still hasn't closed. We lost money on our last rehab. We just had another massive setback on another rehab and we will probably lose money. We've only sold 3 rehabs in the last 6 months (goal is 1 a month) because the timelines all mushed and now 4 will be selling in April (I freaking hope).
Last October we started 2 projects at the same time, and they should have been done and sold by the end of the year. Instead, 1 just sold (lost money), and one won't sell till April because of the dang septic system. And we'll likely only make half our profit target on that one. In December I started refocusing on my rehabs (because I really had to let it run on autopilot while I was ramping up the marketing team), and I've realized that my project manager just doesn't have the logistics brain necessary for it. She's a great assistant, but she needs someone to be an assistant to, and I don't have the time needed. So now I'm looking at hiring ANOTHER person, or cutting back on rehabs. But oh by the way, I just hired a construction crew. (Not actually super worried about that. Worst case scenario I become a for real construction company and hire them out. People are clamoring for remodels.)
We need an office space because the township is coming down on my home office, and I have a house I want to use, but with this level of uncertainty, I feel like I need to sell it instead and rent an office. That's tough, because I really love it, and it would be a great story. On the other hand, it's in a flood zone and has a septic system, so maybe I should just dump it. Freaking septic systems.
I'm terrified. We're not losing money, but we're not really making any yet this year. The $20k that we've made overall will go toward our tax bill for last year. I don't even know how to solve any of this. I need to just let go and let God, but faith is one of those things you think you have till times get tough. Then you figure out who you really are. I hope I'm more than just words. I also KNOW that all these problems are just noise. I am healthy. I am happy. My husband is amazing and supportive, and if I had to walk away from all of it today he would support me and we would figure out the next chapter. My kids are adorable and healthy and I hate even wasting one ounce of worry on this stuff when I should be soaking in every precious second of them. My parents are around and healthy and wonderful. My extended family is in great shape all around, despite a few medical issues. I am blessed. But knowing it in my head and settling it firmly into my heart are 2 different things, and that is what I'm striving for tonight. To FEEL in my soul what I KNOW in my head.
(Written March 11, 2018 and not published until a year later)
Here is the backstory:
2017 I spent building a marketing company. It's called wholesaling, but it's essentially being the marketing and sales department for other rehabbers. We broke even 9 months out of the year, and then the last quarter everything came together and we crushed it. I was fired up for 2018 to start and had dreams of just crushing the crap out of it. Monster goals. $2.1M goals (which, btw, is 4x what we did last year, but seemed totally doable with the trajectory we were on)
And then everything slowed down. Still putting out the same marketing, hitting the channels that worked and adding in some new ones to try to get efficient. Still getting the appointments. Not getting the contracts. (Our goal was 16, we got about 6 in Jan and Feb) But when we got those contracts, they sold fast. Now our past 2 contracts aren't selling. One property we've had under contract since October (with 2 different buyers), still hasn't closed. We lost money on our last rehab. We just had another massive setback on another rehab and we will probably lose money. We've only sold 3 rehabs in the last 6 months (goal is 1 a month) because the timelines all mushed and now 4 will be selling in April (I freaking hope).
Last October we started 2 projects at the same time, and they should have been done and sold by the end of the year. Instead, 1 just sold (lost money), and one won't sell till April because of the dang septic system. And we'll likely only make half our profit target on that one. In December I started refocusing on my rehabs (because I really had to let it run on autopilot while I was ramping up the marketing team), and I've realized that my project manager just doesn't have the logistics brain necessary for it. She's a great assistant, but she needs someone to be an assistant to, and I don't have the time needed. So now I'm looking at hiring ANOTHER person, or cutting back on rehabs. But oh by the way, I just hired a construction crew. (Not actually super worried about that. Worst case scenario I become a for real construction company and hire them out. People are clamoring for remodels.)
We need an office space because the township is coming down on my home office, and I have a house I want to use, but with this level of uncertainty, I feel like I need to sell it instead and rent an office. That's tough, because I really love it, and it would be a great story. On the other hand, it's in a flood zone and has a septic system, so maybe I should just dump it. Freaking septic systems.
I'm terrified. We're not losing money, but we're not really making any yet this year. The $20k that we've made overall will go toward our tax bill for last year. I don't even know how to solve any of this. I need to just let go and let God, but faith is one of those things you think you have till times get tough. Then you figure out who you really are. I hope I'm more than just words. I also KNOW that all these problems are just noise. I am healthy. I am happy. My husband is amazing and supportive, and if I had to walk away from all of it today he would support me and we would figure out the next chapter. My kids are adorable and healthy and I hate even wasting one ounce of worry on this stuff when I should be soaking in every precious second of them. My parents are around and healthy and wonderful. My extended family is in great shape all around, despite a few medical issues. I am blessed. But knowing it in my head and settling it firmly into my heart are 2 different things, and that is what I'm striving for tonight. To FEEL in my soul what I KNOW in my head.
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